I was diagnosed with a brain tumor in 2013, right in the middle of my medical residency. Before that, I was just going through the motions, making sure I saw enough patients to reach my numbers, graduate, and practice on my own. But on March 13, 2013, my view of medicine changed drastically—and I owe it all to love.
Love diagnosed me, treated me, helped me through the hospitalization, and aids in my recovery to this day. In short, love saved my life. On that day in 2013 when I developed double vision, a prominent, local neurologist obtained the MRI and laboratory work that gave me a diagnosis. Unlike me, he wasn’t merely going through the motions. He loved his craft and it was because of this love that I was diagnosed.
When I needed surgery, the neurologist consulted with a neurosurgeon who performed the 16-hour surgery. What possesses someone to operate for 16 hours? What drove him to wake up every morning before the sun rises to visit me? Only love of his art could motivate him, I believe.
In my initial post-operative phase, I was in the ICU for one week, followed by a month-long stay on the general floor where I received dozens of visitors, including my primary care physician; a rehabilitation doctor; speech, occupational, and physical therapists; a neurologist; an ophthalmologist, and a neuropsychologist.
Many of these visits, especially from the physical therapist, were frustrating. Saying words like bumblebee, or putting pegs in a board did not thrill me. Many times I wanted to skip these appointments, but the love of my wife and two sons always urged me on.
It was the love of my friends that reminded me that I would get better. It was their love that gave me the hope I needed. Now, when I am doing balance exercises at the gym, I close my eyes and picture my friends and family. Their love makes me do that extra exercise; they are the reason I try to recover.
My words may sound cliché, but no matter how I spin it, I can’t get around the fact that love has been the driving force behind this whole journey, from diagnosis to recovery.
As a physician, I hope to use this love in all my encounters. The days of going through the motions are behind me. I realize it is unrealistic to love every one of my future patients. Instead, I will love the art of medicine and the fact that I am fortunate enough to be in a position to help people.
Christopher Chiou, MD, practices family medicine in Okemos, MI, where he lives with his wife, who is also a doctor, and two sons. He has recently begun writing about health in various journals.